Maybe We Should Go Back?

Maybe We Should Go Back?

Ahoy there. All that time spent browsing, uploading, customizing, polishing...  And in the end I still hated the way it looked.  So much so that I let it all go, and stopped writing completely.  I suppose, at the time, I was enamored with the concept of being both published in print and having a professional-looking blog.  So naturally I needed a sleek new Wordpress theme that would convey my hilarious takes on modern life with the proper style and verve... But who am I trying to kid. Trees around the world breathed a collective sigh of…Read more …
“Schpidah!”

“Schpidah!”

It appears a Thanagarian Snare Beast has taken up residence in the barbecue grill in that picture. Not the little "Old Smokey" bbq. Not the covered one behind it either. The big one, right up front, with the fern in it. And no, I don't know why I keep a fern in the BBQ. Come to think of it, I don't know why I have three BBQ pits either. *shrug* I live in Texas. Let's move on. So every single morning this week, as I'm leaving the house and mentally preparing myself for…Read more …
Free Parking

Free Parking

Obviously, there are some things in this life that are capable of inducing a fury in me that is devoid of rational thought. The Yankees are one of them. Another trigger, perhaps even worse than the Yankees, would be when someone parks in my reserved parking spot. This morning, as I'm pulling into work (so I'm not exactly in a great mood to begin with), I rounded the corner in the garage to my usual level, only to find a piece of shit 1992 Lexus sedan with a "W" sticker on the back…Read more …
Il Cinque Maggio

Il Cinque Maggio

It's Mexican Independence Day Mexican Debt Collection Day! Yes, today we drink Coronas and eat tamales to celebrate a Mexican President's decision to stop paying the juice legally owed on his country's loans. It's true! As you might imagine, this irritated people in quite a few nations. Although none more so than the French, who became so pissed off about it that they simply invaded Mexico. Thus prompting the largest repo mission in history. They cut a swath across the country, beating the piss out of the Mexicans along the way...with one exception.…Read more …

I’d Like to Talk About the Gym For a Moment…

So, if you're one of the people who aren't privy to this kind of information, I've been going to the gym regularly for the past 6 months. (Well, on Monday/Wednesday/Friday mornings anyway.)During this time, I haven't seen a whole lot of change in my overall build. Although it seems I'm the only one. My bicep apparently frightened Sobriquet's grandmother over Thanksgiving so much that I had to assure her, (repeatedly), that no, I was not going to choke her granddaughter...ever. But my lean muscle mass isn't the point of this post. The point…Read more …

Deathsick: Redux

The DeathSick has struck yet again. Although it's been a couple years since I was truly ill, so I suppose I was due for it.I spent the entirety of this past weekend melting into a chair in my living room, watching HBO and trying to recall exactly when a puffer fish had climbed into my mouth and built a winter cottage out of penny nails and steel wool.And while it's possible that this could've been the dreaded Bacon Flu, I don't really believe so. First, because I've already rounded the sickness nadir (I…Read more …